Embracing Failure: a Way to Thrive in Our Times

Denise Frakes, Home and Life Coach • Oct 01, 2020

Every year, October brings quick shifts in the weather. It moves in with a kind of warning as if to say “Get ready. The rains, wind and long nights are coming.”

When I think of winter during summer, I cringe. “No!” I say, “Stay warm and sunny!” But every year the winds shift and I start craving cozy living, pumpkins and warm soups. This transition never ceases to amaze me.

We are created to shift and change. This is a blessing because these upcoming seasons will be different from the past. COVID has brought a whole new way of living. Are you ready? If you say no, no worries, we have lots of room to grow.

How will we thrive in this changing season? How do we create nourishing, cozy, inspiring and connected homes during COVID? Well, of course I don’t have all the answers, but no one does. The fact that the answers aren’t there creates a place to play and explore in our adult lives like we have never had before. We all have a green light to fail!

Necessity inspires a creative mind. Failure is a good thing. To be an inventor, a scientist, an explorer or an artist, we must ‘embrace the fail’. When we give ourselves the grace of not knowing the answers, of doing things poorly, of being a beginner or dropping to our knees in frustration, we open up our lives and homes to possibilities. We become free. Expectations fade and curiosity grows. We must learn to welcome failure.

Think about this: We shop wearing masks. We hold conversations 6 feet away. We have become teachers, unemployed, supporters of rights. Out of necessity, Zoom has become a household word. We have marched, cried, thrown up our hands and then begun again the next day. We have failed trying Zoom, social distancing, watching too much news and a million other defeats. Yet here we are still standing. We are wobbly on some days and solid as a rock on others, but always we start again.

I say break rules, try new things, sit in new places, be unconventional. Add joyful surprises, turn your kitchen into an art studio or your closet into an office. We can create homes and lives that work for us, this season, during COVID, in the autumn and winter. We can play and adjust and try again.

When I cook, especially, when I’m creating new recipes, I expect to fail. I also expect to have successes. My attachment to either is what gets me in trouble. By trying new things and exploring optional paths, we open our creative, scientific, exploratory minds. This state of mind is beautiful. The exploratory mind is imperfect, flawed and delightfully curious. This state of mind allows failure to be okay because it is part of the creative process.

For the next few months, think of your home as a playhouse. Create your space to be nourishing, interesting, bright, colorful, and delightful. Think of yourself as a 10-year-old; fierce and clear in your spirit. How would your home look and feel if your inner 10-year-old was in charge of creating and decorating?

Give yourself permission not to be perfect. Try on floppy hats, wear pink shoes and explore new things. Remember that no one has all of the answers. Our thriving this season will depend on the gentleness we give ourselves when we struggle and the determination we muster to keep exploring even when it feels like we are failing.

Denise Frakes is a home and life coach. She specializes in clutter clearing, stress reduction, cultivating radiance and living nourished. She is a Master Energy EFT Practitioner, Transformational Life Coach, Healthy Home Specialist, and owner of Blue Sky Services. Learn more at denisefrakes.com or contact Denise at dfbluesky@yahoo.com.

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